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The Meaning of Liff

The Meaning of Liff:

The Original Dictionary Of Things There Should Be Words For

Douglas Adams

John Lloyd




  • 阳光明媚的午后想要去海德公园散步;到了海德公园就开始下雨,只好到附近的商业街商店里躲雨;到了商业街就天晴了,于是打算折返公园;回到公园就又下雨了。薛定谔的公园就是一到就下雨、远离就放晴的可以通过行走距离反向操控天气的机制。
  • (真)新年心愿就是许了总归不能实现的新年心愿。
  • (真)新年决心是过完一年回顾总结的时候发现别人都能实现、自己永远不能实现的东西。


CLIXBY (adj.) Politely rude. Briskly vague. Firmly uninformative.

DES MOINES (pl.n.) The two little lines which come down from your nose.

DOGDYKE (vb.) Of dog-owners, to adopt the absurd pretence that the animal shitting in the gutter is nothing to do with them.

DUDOO (n.) The most deformed potato in any given collection of potatoes.

GLASGOW (n.) The feeling of infinite sadness engendered when walking through a place filled with happy people fifteen years younger than yourself.


LIFF (n.) A book, the contents of which are totally belied by its cover. For instance, any book the dust jacket of which bears the words. ‘This book will change your life’.

MOFFAT (n. tailoring term) That part of your coat which is designed to be sat on by the person next of you on the bus.

NYBSTER (n.) Sort of person who takes the lift to travel one floor.


WORKSOP (n.) A person who never actually gets round to doing anything because he spends all his time writing out lists headed ‘Things to Do (Urgent)’.

YESNABY (n.) A ‘yes, maybe’ which means ‘no’.

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